Shut up about reviving the Expos already
Bringing back something that is dead, obsolete, or which never caught on to begin with is one of the noblest callings in life, I know. (That's why I now use the word "scenester," like all the time.) But this BS about reviving the Expos — always timed to coincide with the start of the Major League Baseball (MLB) season — needs to stop. NOW.
The latest to flog this horse is a group led by former Expos outfielder Warren Cromartie, who, along with the Montreal Board of Trade, are spending $400,000 on a study to figure out if it's something we want. Because everyone needs a hobby.
Yeah, yeah, we've heard the potted history: our plucky, beloved franchise that excelled at spotting talent, done in by having to play inside the billion-dollar boondoggle that is le Stade Olympique (which one sports writer said was like playing inside the world's largest ashtray), by a stingy post-Charles Bronfman consortium of owners, and by the mid-season strike in 1994, which cut short our unofficial stint as "the best team in baseball" and soured fans on the franchise.
But this time will be different, Projet Baseball Montreal swears! They claim that the strong dollar, MLB's revenue-sharing deal among clubs, better broadcasting deals, and, of course, social media, means that big-league baseball could have a future again in Montreal. And then there's all the young people (yours truly included), who are buying and wearing the caps with the retro logo ALL THE TIME, because we're hardcore Expos fans you see, and not just being ironic d-bags at all!
Sorry dudes, but no provincial government (minority or otherwise) is going to help pony up half a billion for a new stadium on post-industrial wasteland across from Griffintown on the other side of the Lachine Canal. I mean, remember the 90s? Back then, the feds had promised some land and there was Big Beer money behind the bid, but then provincial politicians flip-flopped and a downtown Labatt Field died a vapourware death. (Thanks, Lucien Bouchard!) Today, the feds can probably buy more votes by making noises about returning NHL hockey to Quebec City instead. And who even knows how long Pauline Marois will be around?
Luckily, there's no shortage of
dumb ideas on the internet. Here's one: let's all 3.5 million of us each chip in $100 to buy a pro baseball team, like this guy says!
So what to do? Well, what is there to do? We can be realistic and resign ourselves to something second-best, such as reviving the Montreal Royals, a triple-A baseball team that counted future greats like Jackie Robinson among its ranks. With a storied sports team like Le Canadien as the main show in town, it's not like we need to prove our pro sports chops to any one else out there. Especially not Toronto.
Or just watch this touching documentary below, like the good slacktivist you are. Reminisce. Cry into your beer. You and Sad Expos Lady. And get used to yet another MLB season without your beloved Expos. Because they're dead, okay? They're not coming back. And the sooner we get a grip on that and move on, the sooner we can focus on more pressing things, like fixing those infamous nids-des-poule Mayor Michael Applebaum keeps photo-op-ing.